#YouCan’tMakeThisStuffUp Part 5 of 5

Today’s blog post wraps up my recent tale of woe. We pick up the story when the nurse was checking on the status of my shower chair/portable toilet and the woman at the other end of the phone call responds, “I’m on it.”

In case you missed Part 4 yesterday, here’s a link to it: #YouCan’tMakeThisStuffUp Part 4 of 5. ­­­­

Home at last

I’m finally presented with my “throne” and Marie and I leave the hospital. We stop on the way home for some lunch at a fast-food restaurant’s drive-through window since we are now getting very hungry. (My breakfast had been interrupted no less than eight times by various hospital personnel, so I don’t remember what or when I ate it.)

My sister, Marie, is a very resourceful person. Not able to find a bridge threshold ramp that will work with our particular threshold, she goes to the basement and comes back with two wooden planks, a piece of 2-inch wide crown molding, and a piece of slick-backed insulation. She’s a genius!

Her plan works great! When I need to go for a follow-up appointment with my doctor, we won’t have to call the fire department to carry me out of the house! We are proud of ourselves, but mainly I’m proud of Marie. She figured this out!

An outing to see the physician’s assistant

I make an appointment to follow up with my primary care physician. When I explain to the lab technician how I broke my leg, she says, “You’re kidding, aren’t you? How did it really happen?” After I assure her that I’ve told her the real story, she says, “You can’t make this stuff up!”

I agree. I write some fiction, but I lack the imagination to make up the story you’ve read since Monday.

What next?

The other day I texted my friend, Kay, about the latest part of my tale of woe. Kay texted back, “LOL! What’s next?”

Less than an hour later, Marie is pushing me down the hall in my rollator. Suddenly, it becomes difficult to push. I can’t believe it when Marie says, “You have a flat tire!”

Who knew a rollator could have a flat tire?

I texted Kay. She responded, “I’ve used a rollator for years, but I’ve never had a blowout!”

My rollator is old. Marie bought it at a yard sale. It’s so old, replacement tires are not made for it. I could order one on E-Bay that might work, but for an additional $50.00 I could purchase a new rollator.

Since I won’t need the rollator forever, and I have a very resourceful sister, I don’t need to buy a new one. Marie repaired the tire with duct tape! It brought back memories of our father having tires recapped back in the day before the invention of radial tires.

Where things stand today

I can get in and out of the house in my rollator with Marie’s assistance. Of course, now we’re under a “Stay at Home” order in my county due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

I can’t put any weight on my right foot for another three-and-a-half weeks, and it remains to be seen what happens to the physical therapy I’ll need in the coming months. I can’t imagine any physical therapists will be seeing patients in the coming months.

I expect to be on a blood thinner for the next three months, since the pulmonary embolism was the result of an accident and not due to an underlying medical condition. My lung continues to hurt if I lie down flat, so I’m sleeping nearly sitting up. I still run a fever most evenings. I’m trying to learn patience.

The phone still rings and it frustrates me when the caller ID box says, “SPAM” or “Fraudulent Caller” and I wonder why the phone company isn’t filtering such calls.

One caller left a voicemail. She claimed her name was “Sunshine” and that she knew I was an author. She said she represents “a hybrid company that also invests in French National Book Rights.” She asked that I call her at 302-770-____, Ext. 87, but I didn’t. I’m only an author because I wrote a vintage postcard book, The Blue Ridge Mountains of North Carolina and I doubt that anyone wants to translate it into French.

By the way, the burial insurance agent called again yesterday. That recorded caller doesn’t give up easily.

Until my next blog post

Take care of yourself. Stay home, if you possibly can. Listen to the medical experts and other scientists.

Write a note of caring and thanks to someone you know – maybe to the pharmacist, the nurse at your doctor’s office, or the cashier at the grocery store.

Be resourseful! Be like Marie!

Today concludes my tale of woe since fracturing my leg on January 27.. At least, I hope the “woe” part of the tale is over. On Monday I plan to resume my usual weekly blog post.


A thank-you note
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash

15 thoughts on “#YouCan’tMakeThisStuffUp Part 5 of 5

  1. I waited to reply when I’d finished the whole story. Oh, my. Truly, this is something you couldn’t make up. I’m so sorry for all you’ve endured. Please know I have prayed for you. I enjoy reading your blog and have made note of several of the books. Take care and stay in. 😳 Love, Your former roomie

    Sent from my iPad


    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi, Anita. Thank you so much! It’s really been bazarre. Thank you for your prayers. I’m glad you enjoy my blog. That means a lot to me. In this time of pandemic, I pray you and your family will stay safe and well. With Julia in the high-risk category, I know you have extra concerns. Stay safe, my friend.


  3. Thoroughly delightful if horrifying story. You really can NOT make this stuff up. Please heal well. Ps The links you posted on #3 and #4 did not work. I had to go directly to your blog to read them.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. What a story, Janet! You really can’t make this stuff up, but once again, I admire you positive attitude and wit when telling your story. I think there may still be therapy and teletherapy (on video) in the works with PTs etc. I hope you are able to get the therapy you need. Thinking of you and your resourceful sister! Your parents would be so proud of how you two lean on each other. ♥️

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I thought I commented already, but I don’t see it, Janet. I think your parents would be so proud of you and Marie and how you lean on each other. You told your story with grace and wit, and while I’m sorry it happened to you, you have certainly made the best of all of it. ♥️

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Thank you so much, Jennifer for your lovely compliment! I see now that you did leave a comment two hours ago but I failed to see it. Sorry about that. I’ll approve and like it in a minute. Thank you very much for your kind comments!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. No need to be sorry, Janet! I got interrupted while I replied and so I thought maybe I didn’t really reply… and I wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed reading your story. It’s funny how one comment went to spam and one didn’t- WordPress! ♥️

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Thank you, Alison. And thanks for letting me know about the links not working. Why did WordPress think this was a good week to change the icon for linking? I don’t do well with change, especially when it comes to the computer. I’ll know now to keep an eye on that. I appreciate your telling me. Stay safe!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thank you. Enjoy some books this weekend. You must be a speed reader. I marvel at how many books you review! Wish I could read faster! Enjoy the warm weather this weekend. I have allergies, so I’ll just enjoy it through my window. Don’t worry. I have a great view out my window, including a birdfeeder, a dogwood tree, some azaleas, and the beautiful Carolina blue sky. I’m not missing anything except the pollen! Take care.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I feel so badly for you. You tell quite a tale. I recently went through six months of medical procedures and hospitalizations and they are no fun. Take care of yourself. I’m glad you have your sister.


  11. Thank you, David. Without my sister, I believe I would have had to go to a nursing facility. Having her here with me has made all the difference in my recovery. I hope you are on the upswing with your health issues. Stay safe.


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